Five Minute Friday — Opportunity

Posted on March 1, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

Here’s this week’s installment of Five Minute Friday. You might remember the task is to write for five minutes on a specific prompt word. The initiative was started by Lisa-Jo Baker (http://lisajobaker.com/2013/03/five-minute-friday-ordinary-2/) who thought about writing and how often our perfectionism gets in the way of our words. And she figured, why not take five minutes and see what comes out: not a perfect post, not a profound post, just five minutes of focused writing. Hundreds of blogger take the time to join in … and I’m glad I am one of them.

The prompt this week was OPPORTUNITY.

Here goes. The timer is set for five minutes {clock starts now}

You get up in the morning and start your routine. Just ordinary stuff you do by rote. Maybe a little Bible reading and reflection, some time with the family, off to work, back home for more family time. It’s all pretty routine, day after day, ordinary.

But, we all interact with others all day, dozen, maybe even hundreds, most tangentially. We don’t even realize they are there most of the time.

It’s all ordinary … unless you rattle off a well-placed word, or smile at a stranger, or hold open a door for someone you don’t know, or — like the despised Samaritan — stop and help a stranger just because he needs help. It could be as simple as picking up a dropped paper or more serious like helping out at an accident.

It is those times the …

STOP

… ordinary becomes extraordinary, not because we did something but because we allowed the light of the Lord to shine through us. Let’s be extraordinary.

Five minutes sure does go fast!

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER:  The virtuous person is a happy person.

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Nostalgia

Posted on February 28, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

I’ve been watching some old Oscar winning films, like Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, Bell, Book and Candle, North by Northwest, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, From Here to Eternity and Anatomy of a Murder. I took advantage of TiVo to squirrel away others for future viewing, like Cat Ballou, On the Waterfront, Easy Rider, The Guns of Navarone and Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice. I’ve seen most of them before, but it’s kind of interesting to watch them again through the lens of time.

I was struck by the cinematography. Many of the films are in black and white with flat backgrounds. And, that was cutting edge back in the 1950s and 1960s. My, oh my, how far we have come technologically.

I was also struck by the acting. By today’s standards, the acting seems amateurish and fake, but I remember watching some of those films for the first time completely engrossed in the characters and character development. Take Jimmy Stewart for example. In the films I watched again, Stewart and his mannerism were the same regardless of his character. We won’t talk about dying scenes.

The dialogue is always interesting as words like “queer” or “gay” had an entirely different connotation. And you can sense the censor’s pen just the way conversations flowed, although an occasional reference to McCarthyism slipped through.

I found myself wondering what these films would look like if they were released today. I mean, From Here to Eternity was almost banned back in 1953 and many felt it was too racy for the big screen. A few years later (1959) Anatomy of a Murder dealt “graphically” with sex and rape. Following the same screenplay, each of these would probably get a PG rating and a ho-hum from audiences. Laura Manion (Lee Remick) may have teased her 1959 Anatomy of a Murder audience, but showed little skin. The signature First Sergeant Milton Warden (Burt Lancaster) and Karen Holmes (Deborah Kerr) beach scene in From Here to Eternity wasn’t the least bit salacious by today’s standards. I thought the most suggestive scene was the fade out when Warden first visited Holmes, his captain’s neglected wife.

Of course, the stories followed the times. There are plenty of cigarettes, immediate physical attractions and suggested hanky-panky. The cigarettes may be gone today and the hanky-panky would be less suggested and more visual. Otherwise, story lines have not really changed that much.

I enjoy watching the old classics for another reason … the cars. I can identify with the boxy Dodges, and needle nose Studebakers, and finned Cadillacs, and rounded Nashes. Convertibles were in {even in the rain} and it wasn’t unusual to see broken door handles, dents and scratches and wing windows. I’m amused at the cabs — all yellow {okay gray in a black and white flick} in New York City — with fares emblazoned on the door. “Twenty-five cents for the first fifth mile, five cents each additional fifth mile.” Riders often pay in coin … with no bulletproof dividers.

Nostalgia.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Be open to all the grace God wants to give while you’re here.

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Wednesday Writing XII

Posted on February 27, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

Well, it’s Wednesday so it‘s time to add to our collaborative community story.

We’re following a flashback of our main character, Samantha.

Here’s where we left off.

So many questions … so few answers…

The parents set up a dinner with us the next day. We agreed, but on our way back to the hotel, I told Chad we were being set up. “You know they want to separate us,” I said.

“I know,” said Chad, “but that’s not going to happen.”

Our dinner went just as expected. My mom, while cordial, said she felt I should stay at home while Chad “figured out the lay of the land” in Ohio. Besides, she said, “you still have school. You’re not going to throw away the past three years, are you?” Dad, likewise, had a million reasons why his little girl should not go to Ohio. Chad’s dad said he was willing to build a little apartment for us, a project his mom fully endorsed. And all four felt we should get married “in the eyes of God.”

We listened, at first adamant about starting our lives together. But the constant “suggestions” started wearing us — or, more accurately — Chad down. After dessert, we gave them all our hugs and kisses and headed back to the hotel. That’s when Chad said, “You know, they made some sense. I have to report for duty. I don’t even know if I’ll be allowed off base right away. And I don’t know anything about the Dayton area.”

I, on the other hand, was very quiet. I said very little, my eyes slowly welling with tears. Finally, I pulled my hand away and said to him, “Why did we even bother to get married?”

I guess you could say that was our first disagreement, just over two days from our I do’s.

I knew Chad was right, but I was hurt. I felt betrayed, especially since he promised it — our separation — wouldn’t happen.

We continued to discuss the issue at the hotel and “agreed” I would stay here while he settled in. But I let him know in no uncertain terms I wasn’t happy with the decision. We went to bed with a kiss and “I love you” but we went to sleep — or at least pretended to sleep.

Tuesday, Chad headed to Ohio and I went back home …

There you go, readers. What’s next?  How long were they separated? How did that impact their marriage?

All you have to do is put down your thoughts and get them to me. You can post your ideas as comments on the blog – but remember everyone will see them, so the “surprise” factor might get lost – or you can e-mail me directly at revblt@rochester.rr.com. Each Wednesday I will continue the story on the blog, along with that week’s attribution and periodically update Reveille/Between the Lakes readers. The complete story thus far is available on the blog under “Story.”

I hope we can have some fun with this.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: A man becomes exactly the person he wants to become.

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Peter Pan and Puff

Posted on February 25, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

I had to wake up the grandkids this morning. As the bewitching hour approached I found myself engrossed in another of my weird dreams. It involved head lice {no idea} and me hanging out of a window holding a soaking wet file folder so the breeze could dry it out {don’t know where that came from}. Then I was at a big table with two faceless older people and I was yelling “I don’t want to grow up! I don’t want to grow up!” pounding the table with my fist in cadence with the pealing bells that served as my alarm {honest, I did not have any pepperoni}.

Well, after the cobwebs cleared, my tantrum reminded me of Peter Pan and Puff the Magic Dragon.

I do have a Peter Pan complex. I really don’t want to grow up. In fact, my wife would have told you she raised six children … and I was the hardest.

I may not be as pompous at Peter Pan {at least, I hope not} but I would cherish the opportunity for an exhilarating life free of grown-up rules and adventures in Neverland with mermaids, Indians and the wicked Captain Hook and his pirate crew. And, given the choice, I would probably return to Neverland like Peter rather than join the grown up world.

That brings us to Puff. He is happy when engaged in the imaginary adventures of childhood with playmate Jackie Paper. I always felt bad for Puff who was left alone when Jackie Paper grows up and loses interest  in the adventures. “A dragon lives forever, but not so little boys.” Isn’t that sad?

I think I could get along quite well with Peter Pan, Tinkerbell and Puff. I don’t want to grow up! I don’t want to grow up! Next stop … Neverland and the hills of Honalee.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: We all have the power to choose happiness each and every day. That doesn’t mean we ignore our challenges or we can always control everything that happens to us, but it does mean, with God’s help, we can choose to respond to God’s inevitable setbacks and hard times with a positive attitude. You have the power to focus on solutions, to surround yourself with supportive people, to rise above criticism and discouragement and to put your faith in God and trust His plan for your life. Be happy with who God created you to be and enjoy each day you are given as His gift. If you do this, you will make every day a Friday. — Joel Osteen

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Confession

Posted on February 23, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

I confess. This generally jolly old man is not so jolly these days. In fact, he is walking through the days with a black cloud over his head.

I really don’t know why, but I have been in a funk for months. And, although I try to be uplifting and supportive and fill my mind with those positive thoughts I preach, I find myself down, filled with self doubts.

Life is cyclical. There are good times and bad times. There are times when everything goes right and times when everything goes wrong. I’m in the latter cycle — professionally and personally. Every day brings a new challenge. Those challenges are starting to wear me down.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not losing faith. But I’m in a “Job” syndrome. Conventional counsel is curse God and die and my response is, if we receive good at the hand of God, shall we not receive evil? (Job 3:9-10)

I know if there were footprints in the sand, there would only be one set. No. There would be two — one a distinctive set of footprints and another of a foot being dragged and kicking. The latter would be my footprints.

There aren’t any Job-like catastrophes in my life, just a steady stream of challenges that are taxing my focus and draining my energy. Guess where that is coming from?

I’ve been through these cycles before, but this one seems to be lingering. It’s not that I’m feeling bad; I’m just not feeling right. There has been plenty to be thankful for — like my newest grandson’s birth and the anticipated birth of my next grandson within the next few weeks and first great-grandchild within the next few months. I am, but I’m also fearful for them and the world they are coming into. I am not where I thought I would be nor doing the things I thought I would be doing. I’m going through the day to day motions. I feel like I’m letting people down instead of lifting them up. I feel trapped in the second coming of the tweens … you know, in between seasons of your life.

Taking my turn on the couch, I can trace this feeling back to last summer when my Dad died. It must have been more traumatic than I thought, and I guess I haven’t really recovered yet. Even to almost the end, I could bounce ideas and thoughts off him. He was a resource that is no longer there. With his last breath, I suddenly became patriarch of the family. Not just dad or granddad, but elder statesman. Not sure I’m ready for that role.

I uncover more aches and pains each day and have discovered things I could do just five, 10 or 20 years ago are now off limits. I rarely go to the doctor’s but have found myself there three times in the last three months {nothing serious}. I find myself living in the past and looking forward to my eternal future so much that I can’t enjoy the present. And it … is … driving … me … crazy. I’m generally a present type of guy.

Over the years, when I’ve gotten in such a funk, I would call a “time out” to stop and listen. I’ve done the same this go round, but I don’t hear the Voice. This morning, during my quiet time, I read the following commentary on Jeremiah 30 {I’m going through an exegetical reading of Jeremiah} “It lives in hope and an expectation that God will effect in us the understanding we need when we need it (emphasis added). Later, while visiting some other blogs, I came across http://daysmeditations.wordpress.com/ where author Day offered more perspective and reassurance on finding rest for your soul {I would recommend reading it}.

So, friends, this is where my psyche is at this moment in time. I ask for your prayers as I seek the Sonshine.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: You have to enlarge your vision. So often we think, Is it wrong for me to live in a nice house? Is it wrong for me to want a bigger piece of property? Is it selfish of me to want to drive a nice car? Is it okay for me to want to bless my children and leave them an inheritance? God says, “It’s okay. Wear your blessings well.” As long as you’re keeping God in first place and you’re not living selfishly and you’re not making material things your idols, then God wants to give you the desires of your heart. He takes pleasure in blessing His children. — Joel Osteen

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Five Minute Friday — What Mama Did

Posted on February 22, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

Here’s this week’s installment of Five Minute Friday. You might remember the task is to write for five minutes on a specific prompt word. The initiative was started by Lisa-Jo Baker (http://lisajobaker.com/2013/02/five-minute-friday-what-mama-did/) who thought about writing and how often our perfectionism gets in the way of our words. And she figured, why not take five minutes and see what comes out: not a perfect post, not a profound post, just five minutes of focused writing.

I have to admit, this was a tough one for me. The prompt this week was WHAT MAMA DID. What made it difficult was I lived with her for 21 years but lived apart from her for close to 40.

But, anyway, here goes. The timer is set for five minutes {clock starts now}

They say a son is a son until he takes a wife, That’s what Mama — or in my case just Mom — did. She prepared me to take a wife … not only take a wife but keep her close for 40 years.

Mom wasn’t “special” but she was there for me growing up. That’s what she did best … be there through thick and thin, although she wasn’t afraid to let me know when I went astray in my thinking or actions.

She provided a comfortable suburban home and showered both myself, an only child, and my Dad with love despite having more than her share of physical problems. She was a stay at home mom, so I knew she was always there, although I probably didn’t appreciate it or show it at the time. She was …

STOP

… along with Dad, the silent inspiration of what a marriage should be.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER:  Don’t apologize for God’s goodness. Don’t downplay what God has done in your life.

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Play Ball!

Posted on February 21, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

Do you know what tomorrow is?

The first day of spring training!

pe130127Well, actually, it opened today with a Boston split squad against Northeastern University (a 3-0 win) and Boston College (an 11-1 win) {I guess the Red Sox need a little morale booster before the real games begin}, but actual Grapefruit League games start tomorrow with four games scheduled — the Tigers against the Braves, Reds and Indians, Royals and Rangers and Padres against Mariners. By weekend’s end every team will play on the diamond.

When I hear of Spring Training, my mind always wanders back to the 1950s movie Kill the Umpire starring William Bendix. It’s definitely my favorite baseball movie.

Haven’t ever heard about it?

Well, Bendix plays Bill Johnson, a former baseball player who hates umpires. His fanatical devotion to the game has cost him several jobs. And matters are complicated by the fact his father-in-law is a retired umpire. Since he has a hard time staying employed during the baseball season, his father-in-law forces him to matriculate in an umpire school. While he initially tries to get himself expelled, he ultimately comes to enjoy his new job. He becomes an ump in the minor leagues, where blurred vision, caused by using the wrong eyedrops, causes him to see everything twice, earning him a nickname as “Two-Call” Johnson. When he calls a popular player out at home plate, the crowd accuses him of dishonesty, leading to a near-riot during which the involved player is knocked out cold. Johnson must disguise himself as a woman and engage in several subterfuges to get to an important game on time, but his reputation is restored when the player he had originally called against publicly praises him for his honesty as an umpire. The crowd accepts this, although quickly reversing its opinion again after Johnson inevitably, makes another call they do not like. It’s one madcap adventure after another with such comedic heavyweights like Bendix, Ray Collins and William Frawley.

Now, I have to tell you, baseball is not my favorite sport. Football is. But baseball is a great summer diversion. When you hear about Spring Training starting, you know the long days of winter are fading fast — and that’s coming from someone who appreciates the cold and white stuff.

When I was young, I couldn’t wait for the season. I was in awe of Mickey Mantle, Willie Mays, Juan Marichal, Sandy Koufax, et al in the late 50s-early 60s. I was heartbroken when the Dodgers and Giants migrated west, although I can say I did get to see some games at Ebbets Field and the Polo Grounds. I was initially a Giants fan back then, but joined the Yankee bandwagon when the team moved. I remember rushing home to watch the final game of the 1960 World Series. I missed most of the game, but got home just in time to watch the Yankees squander a 7-4 lead in the eighth inning and score two in the top of the ninth to tie the score at 9-9, only to watch Bill Mazeroski — not known as a power hitter — sail a Ralph Terry 1-0 pitch just over the left field wall in Forbes Field, Pittsburgh.

When the Mets came along in 1962, I switched back to National League allegiance. They were so bad (40-120 that first year), I guess I felt I could play for them. And they had such a list of characters in those early years … Marvelous Marv Throneberry … Roger Craig {18 straight losses in 1963} … Choo Choo Coleman … Ed Kranepool … Gil Hodges, Richie Ashburn and Don Zimmer (all well past their prime) … and the irascible Casey Stengel as manager.

I sort of lost interest in baseball after the strike year of 1981, but started to get back into it about four years ago after watching games with my dad, a staunch Yankee fan.

I still prefer football … especially games in the snow. But watching baseball gives you an opportunity to multitask between pitches and innings.

At any rate, it’s time to Play Ball!

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: If you’ll develop a habit of putting the right thoughts in — thoughts of faith, thoughts of hope, encouraging thoughts, can do thoughts — eventually your mind will be transformed.

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Wednesday Writing XI

Posted on February 20, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

Well, it’s Wednesday {already} and time to add to our collaborative community story.

We’re following a flashback of our main character, Samantha.

Here’s where we left off.

We talked for awhile, figuring out how we were going to tell our parents, figuring out where we would live, fantasizing about our future together. Around 10, I went into the bathroom and walked out in my negligee. It admittedly did not stay on very long and this time it felt right, very right…

Chapter Four

The first thing Chad and I had to face was our parents. We went to my house first.

As we walked in the house, I called Mom from the kitchen and Dad from his upstairs workshop. When they gathered in the living room, I announced, “Mom, Daddy, Chad and I got married.”

It seemed like forever before either of them said anything, although it really was just a matter of seconds. Mom broke the silence.

“You did what? When? Where? What were you two thinking?” she asked in her usual animated manner. And before I could answer, she continued, “No! No! This is wrong! This is wrong! Are you pregnant?”

“No, Mom. I’m not pregnant ad this isn’t wrong!” I responded.

“How could you do this to us?” she continued, oblivious to my words. She then looked directly at Chad and said, “How could you do this? How could you take advantage of my daughter?”

“Mom,” I interjected. “This was our decision, not Chad’s, ours.”

“And what am I supposed to tell everybody? My daughter got married and didn’t care enough to tell me.”

“Mom, listen to yourself. Why do you always have to be the center of attention. Can’t you be happy for us?”

“No,” she said. “This is a mistake you’ll regret for the rest of you life. After all we’ve done for you. You’re so ungrateful.”

Tears were pouring from my eyes as she turned away with her hands raised.

Daddy stepped in. He was certainly shaken by the news, but gave me a tearful hug and whispered, “I’ll talk to Mom. I’ll make her understand. We went through this exact same thing. We eloped just before I was deployed to Korea.” That was a story I had never heard before.

Then he gave me a bigger hug and said, “Congratulations! I love you. Don’t ever forget that.” And he turned to Chad with an outstretched hand that evolved into a hug. “Welcome to the family, as crazy as it is. You just better make sure you take care of my little girl.”

“I will, sir,” Chad responded.

“Have you told your folks yet?” Dad continued and when we told him they were next, he shooed us out the door. “Go. I’ll take care of things here.”

The ride to Chad’s house was quiet. I was replaying the scene at my house over and over in my mind while Chad tried to calm me down. “We’ve got each other, right?” he would say. “Hey, I love you … No regrets.”

Chad led the way into his house and called his Mom and Dad. The scene was eerily similar yet distinctively different. “Mom. Dad. I want to introduce you to my wife, Samantha Watt.”

His Mom started to cry but without the histrionics reached out to me and grabbed my hand. “Let me see that ring,” she said. “Welcome.” Then she turned to Chad and gave him a playful punch in the arm. “You could have warned me,” she said. His Dad was a little more reserved at first, but quickly warmed up. “Congratulations, you two. I never would have thought you would just run off.” He put his arm around his wife. As she looked up at him, he asked if my parents knew. When we related the story, he said “I’ll give Joe a call.” His Mom asked who else knew.

So many questions … so few answers…

There you go, readers. What’s next?

All you have to do is put down your thoughts and get them to me. You can post your ideas as comments on the blog – but remember everyone will see them, so the “surprise” factor might get lost – or you can e-mail me directly at revblt@rochester.rr.com. Each Wednesday I will continue the story on the blog, along with that week’s attribution and periodically update Reveille/Between the Lakes readers.

I hope we can have some fun with this.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: You have been chosen and set apart before the foundation of the world.

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Rainy Days and Rainbows

Posted on February 17, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

I watched The Good Witch’s Charm  last night. I had TiVoed it last fall, but it sort of got of lost in my queue.

It is a typical Hallmark flick. To bring you up to speed, Good Witch Cassie Nightingale (Catherine Bell) is back to her bewitching ways, but this time she’s also juggling a newborn daughter and her job as town mayor. With such a busy schedule she and her husband, town Sheriff Jake Russell (Chris Potter), aren’t getting much sleep. Hoping for a break, Cassie plans a much needed vacation with her new family. But things go awry when a crime wave sweeps through town and an investigative reporter (Geordie Johnson) tries to ruin Cassie’s image after a video of her magically disappearing turns up on the Internet.

To make matters worse, Cassie’s estranged foster mother (Janet-Laine Green) appears in town and Cassie’s stepdaughter (Hannah Endicott-Douglas) is suddenly accused of the recent robberies. Supported by her loyal family and friends, Cassie must rely on her signature charm to put a stop to the rumors before they completely destroy the town and a Good Witch’s reputation!

In Hallmark fashion, the story is neatly wrapped up in less than two hours and is the last in a five-part Good Witch series including The Good Witch, The Good Witch’s Garden, The Good Witch’s Gift and The Good Witch’s Family. This series offers friendly themes that celebrate relationships, family and communication. Cassie’s ability to see the good in everyone has surprising results for a few of the characters and speaks to the healing power of treating others with respect.

The family vacation goes on the rocks. But Sheriff Russell plans a substitute camping trip. That brings what I thought was the most memorable line of the film. Cassie says, “It may rain during the entire camping trip, but we’ll always remember the rainbows.”

Life often careens off course. Bad things happen. Relationships are tested. Expectations fail. And it’s certainly easy to focus on those. However, if you look beneath the surface, like Cassie, you start to see the good in each and every situation. As I said last time, get in the habit of filling your mind with praise and thanksgiving and expecting good things. When setbacks and disappointments occur, as they will, you will be conditioned and prepared to say, “I know God is about to turn this around. It may be difficult, but this, too, shall pass. It’s only temporary.”

Some people remember the rain, but I like to remember the rainbows.

Remember the rainbows!

By the way, the Hallmark Channel is planning to re-run The Good Witch’s Gift, The Good Witch’s Family and The Good Witch’s Charm March 24. If you get a chance, I would recommend you watch them or tape them. But, don’t forget about them for five months … as I did.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Cleanse your mind and put it on a healthier diet.

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Five Minute Friday … Beloved

Posted on February 15, 2013 by wisdomfromafather

Here’s this week’s installment of Five Minute Friday. You might remember the task is to write for five minutes on a specific prompt word. The initiative was started by Lisa-Jo Baker (http://lisajobaker.com/2013/02/five-minute-friday-beloved/) who thought about writing and how often our perfectionism gets in the way of our words. And she figured, why not take five minutes and see what comes out: not a perfect post, not a profound post, just five minutes of focused writing.

So, the timer is set for five. The word for the week this week is BELOVED … so here goes. {clock starts now}

We didn’t write our wedding vows when Karen and I were married back in the dark ages. But I think if I had to, this is sort of what I would have said.

I, Joe, take thee, Karen, to be my lawfully wedded wife. I’m not going to promise to be perfect, but I will promise to always love you through the good times and the bad times. With God’s help, the good times will be plenty and the bad times short and scarce. I promise to always treat you with respect and never to take you for granted. I value your opinions and your thoughtfulness and your passion and your listening spirit. I promise to stand with you through anything that comes our way. I pray our life together is filled with health and wealth, but if it isn’t, know I will be there. I ask God to be the foundation of our marriage. With His help and acting together, nothing can ever defeat us, May He sustain … STOP

… To continue the thought … May He sustain us to a long, happy life together. I love you … yesterday … today … and all our tomorrows. Be loved always.

That was introspective and experiential. Looking back after Karen died, I certainly was not perfect, but I always loved her. And God was good. The good times were plenty and the bad times short and scarce. We were never materially wealthy and generally healthy, until cancer caught up with her. But even her suffering and death didn’t defeat us. It brought us closer. A 40 year marriage was quite an accomplishment and we both knew we had something special because we had help from above. Even after over four years, I love Karen yesterday … today … and look forward to our tomorrows. Be loved, my love … as I know I am.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER:  Get in the habit of filling your mind with praise and thanksgiving and expecting good things. When setbacks and disappointments occur, as they will, you will be conditioned and prepared to say, “I know God is about to turn this around. It may be difficult, but this, too, shall pass. It’s only temporary.”

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