The Maine Thing

Posted on August 16, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

Those of you who know me either personally or through this blog know I have this fascination with Maine. Over the past six years I have trekked to the Pine Tree State well over a dozen times and have visited and looked at homes on the coast, north country, central, metropolitan and, most recently, western Maine. Towns like Dexter, St. Albans, Ripley, Newport, Dover-Foxcroft, Casco, Lubec, Island Falls, Harrington and most recently Bryant Pond and Rangeley are familiar to me. And, as a follower of the Bangor Daily News, I can identify with many of the story lines and datelines.

You may not know how this fascination began. Well, it dates back about seven years or so when I nonchalantly asked Karen where she wanted to retire to. After a couple of days of thought, she blurted out, “Maine!”

To this day, I do not know why she chose Maine. We had never been there. We didn’t know anyone who lived there. Maine had never come up in our conversations.

But we started to look online and discovered houses were relatively inexpensive, taxes were a lot less and it just “felt” like a good choice, especially since both of us liked the rustic life and are not intimidated by snow and cold.

I even went so far as looking at employment opportunities and, in fact, applied for two positions — one in Aroostock County (waaay up north) and the other in the Augusta area. Karen got busy househunting online with a realtor she never met.

Of course, everything changed six years ago. Instead of visiting Maine, we spent that spring/summer visiting doctors as she battled cancer.

welcome_to_maine_sign_sticker-rb4252b5b683a4c4ba9d5026269b23f27_v9wxo_8byvr_324In light of her wishes — and as part of my healing — I made it to Maine for the first time in January 2009. I picked up where she left off house hunting and found an old church in Dexter I thought would make a good rehab project. I got there on the coldest day of the year surrounded by drifts. The church was great — but much bigger than I first imagined. It had great potential … but not for a 60 year old.

I did find the “perfect” house in St. Albans … but the timing just wasn’t right.

Since then, I have looked at dozens of homes, including the latest in Bryant Pond and Rangeley. Each had positives. Each had negatives.

Since it is just me, I’m not looking for anything too big, preferably on one level with two bedrooms and overlooking water. Since I am still working in New York, ideally I would be looking for a short term lease with an option to buy as I transition into retirement {hint … hint}.

During my trips to Maine, I have discovered “Maine — The way life should be.” The people have been friendly with that small town feel. When I first got to Dexter, everyone — from the police chief to the innkeeper — knew I was “that guy from New Yoowrk” who came to look at houses. I was welcomed at events and churches like an old friend. I can truly say I feel at home when I visit, regardless of the area.

And they have a tremendous sense of humor. Western Maine is kind of mountainous and rural. As I traveled my navigation app would drop. I anticipated that might happen so I printed out directions, However, if I drifted off course, I would be totally lost … perhaps never to be found again. So I picked up an old fashioned map. There it is … a box giving moose viewing tips. And another giving moose crash tips — “Apply brakes … let up just before impact … aim for the hind end … duck down.”

vistaExcept for a few hours on the New York Thruway to Albany and a stretch of Route 91 in Vermont, getting to western Maine from upstate New York consists mainly of winding roads, mountains and valleys. Tremendous and breathtaking views.

But as I was twisting and turning, the thought hit me. If and when I made this move, I am going to be alone. I’m not afraid of being alone. I am quite comfortable in my own little cave. It bothered me when I thought of the alone. This was supposed to be our adventure — Karen’s and mine. And that is just never going to happen.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: If you get the chance to travel across the country or across the globe, take it. You will learn way more from people who are different from you than the ones who are the same.

Posted in family, growing old, Maine, Memories, observations, relationships, travel | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Five Minute Friday — Tell

Posted on August 15, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

It’s time to carve out five minutes for some focused, yet free-flowing writing along with the crew at Five Minute Friday, a free write with no editing, no over-thinking, no worrying about perfect grammar or punctuation. Just write. {okay, we may clean it up a bit}

This week’s prompt is TELL. So, let’s get going. The timer is set and it is time to START

We all have a story to tell. It could be about our life, a particular incident, our likes and dislikes, even our faith walk.

We generally aren’t afraid to share the information in one on one situations, but often become reluctant when facing a larger crowd … or writing in a public settling like a blog.

But it’s important to share our experiences — verbally or in written form. That’s how our legacy continues.

I  am fortunate to come from a large Italian family with plenty of anecdotes. My dad filled me in on a lot of family history, most of it in his waning years. But I know very little about my mom’s family and heritage. And that’s sad.

And of course, a key part in this disclosure is our faith walk. We believers must tell the story — as we learned it, as we embraced it, as we live it. Others should be able … STOP

… to see  and hear that faith in action.

As they used to say after each episode of The Naked City, an action/crime/drama about the 65th Precinct in New York City in the ’50s and ’60s, “There are eight million stories in the naked city; this has been one of them.”

Tell your story. Pass it along.

Well, that’s what I came up with this week. Read what others have contributed at http://katemotaung.com/2014/08/14/five-minute-friday-tell/. You won’t be disappointed.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Never lie about anything really important. The first lie will cause you to have to lie again and again to cover up the truth. And each time you’ll chip away an important piece of yourself.

Posted in encouragement, family, Five Minute Friday, stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

200,000 Miles

Posted on August 14, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

My little red truck turned 200,000 yesterday. It’s poor little body is showing its age, but it’s heart and soul keep pumping forward.

I love that little red truck and have enjoyed the 125,000 miles or so I have contributed. I’ve had so many adventures from Maine and the Jersey shore to the flatlands of Illinois — and most of the states in between.

My little red truck is just that, a 1998 Ford Ranger. No frills. Standard transmission. Four cylinders. Dents and dings all over the place. Mismatched tail lights. A fair amount of Swiss cheese effect on the bumper and quarter panels from years of New York winters. Even a drip on the passenger side when it gets caught in a downpour.

Most recently — like last weekend — I added a little over a thousand miles on another venture to Maine. During the time in the cockpit, as I watched the odometer spinning, I thought about some of those adventures. I’ll share some of them with you…

It was the first vehicle I bought entirely on my own {without any input} in about 45 years. Sure, I bought a lot of vehicles over those years, but I always at least talked to Karen about it before making the purchase. I didn’t always listen to her counsel, mind you, but I did talk to her.

I didn’t have it two days before I got a ticket. In my defense, I had my boots on driving down an empty Route 96A without benefit of speed control. As I was pondering {I do that a lot while I drive} the little four cylinders whined to 72 before both I and an oncoming county deputy realized it.

It has carried everything in its bed from rocks to dirt to furniture to wood and, of course, a weekly load of newspapers. She never complained.

Even though it is just a two wheel drive, it handled pretty well in snow {not as much on ice}, thanks to the control from standard transmission. She handled well going downhill on Route 95 during a snowstorm in New Hampshire … probably the most stressful time we shared. Of course, trips to Red Creek in winter were always interesting as well.

She’s been to Maine three times, the Jersey shore three times, Massachusetts a few times, Ohio a couple of times, Illinois twice and various spots in Pennsylvania, New Jersey and New York. We’ve camped out together, watched the sunrise over the ocean, experienced downtown Chicago traffic and hills, valleys, flat roads and countless curves. And she has never complained.

Karen has been in the truck a couple of times, too. Less than a month after she died, I found myself at the Jersey shore. We — me in the flesh and Karen in her urn — drove down to watch the sun rise over the ocean. I needed that to help me start healing. I felt her presence on a crystal clear, albeit chilly night.

Then came Thanksgiving. Again I placed her in the truck and headed to Illinois for Thanksgiving dinner. It was bittersweet, but it gave the grandchildren from the west a chance to say their goodbyes to Grandma. We placed the urn on a mantle and they respectfully visited with her.

The dogs loved the truck as well — at least Tess, our Havanese did. Tag didn’t like traveling too much, but Tess was quite at home in the truck. In fact, if I left the door open for some reason, I would often find her sitting in the seat waiting for me. She especially like looking out the open back cargo window. She was my shotgun while delivering my papers.

I’ve laughed and cried in that truck but always had the radio/CD/apps cranked up (country sounds a lot better in a pick up truck).

Let’s hope we have many more adventures and many more miles together!

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Spend a chunk of time every year with people who are much less fortunate than you are. It will fill your heart with gratitude.

Posted in growing old, Memories, truck | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Five Minute Friday — Fill

Posted on August 8, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

It’s Friday. It’s Friday. It’s time to carve out five minutes for some focused, yet free-flowing writing along with the crew at Five Minute Friday. We’ve changed hosts … but not intent. It still is meant to be a free write, which means no editing, no over-thinking, no worrying about perfect grammar or punctuation. Just write. {okay, we may clean it up a bit}

This week’s prompt from new hostess Kate Motaung is FILL. So, let’s get going. The timer is set and it is time to START

Fill ‘er up.

That’s what we used to say as we pulled up to the pump — except for New Jersey and Oregon where they still have attendants. We fuel up our cars to keep moving forward..

The same is true for our life. As our spiritual fuel winds down, it’s time to refuel. Of course, we get worn down spiritually by, well, life. It sometimes can beat you down to vapors.

Often, we take the easy route … just enough to get by. Maybe a quick prayer or crying out on a friend’s shoulder or wallowing in self pity. We keep fuel — faith — in the tank but have to keep stopping to keep going. We don’t take the time or expend the energy to refuel.

We have a great faith attendant. He lives — and died — to fill our tanks. STOP

Wouldn’t it be great to keep the spiritual tank full all the time?

All it takes is regular stops.

Fill ‘er up.

Well, that’s what I came up this week. Read what others have contributed at http://katemotaung.com/2014/08/07/five-minute-friday-fill/. You won’t be disappointed.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Look deeply into the eyes of the one you are falling for to get a glimpse of his or her soul.

Posted in encouragement, Five Minute Friday, relationships, spirituality | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Free Range Thoughts

Posted on August 4, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

Well, I’m back from a nearly 800 mile weekend excursion to New Jersey. I thought I’d share some of the moments gleaned from the free range of my mind.

Things I didn’t do …

Go sightseeing. Usually, my journey to Jersey — especially Paterson — includes driving past my old house in Totowa Boro and the old neighborhoods in People’s Park and South Paterson. I generally pass my old schools — St. Anthony’s and Don Bosco Tech — to reminisce and always stop at the Great Falls. Didn’t do any of it … except stop at the falls … for about 30 seconds.

Visit people … although I tried. I typically visit with my aunt whenever I come down to Paterson, but Saturday afternoon she didn’t answer the door {not that unusual} but when she didn’t answer the phone as well I assume she was out with one of my cousins. I also tried to connect with family friends in Wayne, but couldn’t reach them either.

Eat at Falls View or Rutt’s Hut. Heresy, I know. Heresy.

Stop at a grocery store. Normally, I make a point of stopping at Pathmark {or whatever they’re calling it these days} or Corrado’s to stock up on “essentials” like Taylor Ham, specialty coffee and snacks. Just didn’t think I needed anything that probably wasn’t good for me.

Make any other food stops. Although I did consider it, I didn’t stop at Dah Dah’s Deli for a freshly made sandwich or Deb Pam Bakery for crumb cake. {Who is writing this stuff?}

Roll up my windows. Conventional wisdom would have dictated otherwise, but I never rolled up my windows when I lived in Paterson so many years ago, and I wasn’t going to be intimidated now. I actually embrace the cultural differences and refuse to be captive to fear. {I may not recommend this to others … especially my female friends.}

Go out. Once I checked in at the Comfort Inn, Fairfield, I pretty much stayed in. I did notice there was a Kohr’s franchise just west of the motel so I did go there for a Saturday night sundae, and I thought about going to a festival or movie. But festivals are more fun with someone and there was nothing at the movies that tripped my trigger.

Swear at other drivers. If you’ve ever driven in New Jersey, you know that was a tough one. But I just moved with the flow, dutifully zigging and zagging around double parked cars, random door openings and pedestrians who don;t know what crosswalks are for.

Speed. Really. I kept it at or no more than 5 mph over the posted speed limit through the whole trip with the caveat being unless my life was threatened for going too slow (see below).

Exit at Exit 82 on the Garden State Parkway. Exit 82 is the Seaside Heights exit. Whizzed right by on my way to my cousin’s house in Manahawken. Opted to whiz right by it on my way home. In my defense I was there just a few weeks ago and I don’t think the ocean changed very much.

Things I did do …

Enjoy my family and friends. That’s what it’s all about. It was my honor to be part of my Aunt Bebe’s 100th birthday celebration, visiting with my aunts, uncles, cousins and friends at the party and visiting with my other cousin (on my mom’s side), his wife and her friends from Paterson Sunday.

Visit the cemetery. It wasn’t a long visit, but I stopped in to say hi to my Mom and Dad. I didn’t cemetery hop like I often do to visit my grandparents, though.

Listen to Pandora. From portal to portal and back {except for occasional dead zones}, Pandora was the entertainment of choice in the car. I set my 26 station playlist to shuffle and had a non-repeating musical cornucopia ranging from classical to country, Christian to contemporary, oldies to showtunes, instrumentals to doo-wop, southern gospel to easy listening.

Watch Titanic. After deciding to stay in Saturday night, I channel surfed and found Titanic on ABC Family. I figured it would be over by 11, so I snuggled under the Comfort Inn comforter with the air conditioner on high to watch it {okay I dozed off periodically, but I did see the steamy back seat sex scene and watched it through until 12:30} Spoiler alert. The ship sinks, Jack dies and Rose throws the million dollar Hope diamond back into the sea.

Had a sausage and pepper sandwich. No, it wasn’t at the shore, but at an Italian restaurant. Not as good as a Seaside sandwich, but close enough. And the sausage had it’s effect with nice, vivid dreams Sunday night.

Didn’t use any navigational tools on the way home. Just followed my instincts. I figured I had driven this way many times before and what’s the worse that could happen? I’d get lost?

Other musings …

Driving skills. It doesn’t matter where you go, but you have to marvel at the driving skills of some other drivers. Case in point … elderly driver enters the Garden State Parkway from a left travel stop at 35 mph without even attempting to accelerate. After backing up the left lane, he merges to the right — in front of a tourist bus. Then he merges to the far right lane, almost hitting a pick-up toy {a freshly washed and waxed truck with all the amenities and none of the dents or wrinkles of a real truck} and forcing him onto the shoulder.

New Jersey drivers. I know speeding is universal, but New Jersey has its own breed. Those little white signs with black numbers are totally ignored and highway drivers have a Route 80 mentality … with an emphasis on 80. That seems to be the speed number of choice … and even at 80, it’s not unusual to be passed on both the right and the left like you’re standing still.

Silver alert. You’ve heard of Amber Alerts … well, I saw my first Silver Alert. A senior was apparently lost in a gold Buick Lucerne with NJ plates starting with a “W…” Didn’t get the rest of the plate number. Hope they found him.

Squirrels. There was a freshly killed one on the Parkway Sunday morning. There were trees to the right and left of the roadway, but why would a squirrel try to navigate four lanes of Sunday morning traffic? Oh, wait. I’m talking about a squirrel.

Engineering. I honestly can’t figure out the engineering genius on the roadways, especially in New Jersey. It’s not unusual to be directed right, left, right, straight, right and left within a quarter mile. They must come from Massachusetts.

Road Construction. Everywhere you go, there are construction zones. It’s been that way for the 50 years I’ve been driving. But did you ever wonder why the roads are still in such horrible condition?

Litter. Aside from the pieces parts and tire chards, did you ever wonder how some of stuff on the side of the road got there? Beachballs, baseball caps, even an occasional beach chair. But a mattress? Or a sectional piece? How did they get there?

Billboards. I read them and realize there is so much we collectively have not scene. Some of the events look rather interesting, as do the non-traditional sites like a Christmas House, museums or the Spirit Gourds of Native America exhibit.

Humidity. I forgot how humid it gets in New Jersey.

And it all leads to today’s thought to remember …

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Always seize the opportunity to share love, love, love with your family and friends. Tomorrow isn’t promised so dance in the rain today!

Posted in celebration, family, love, Memories, New Jersey, observations, relationships, squirrels, travel | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Love! Love! Love!

Posted on August 2, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

If you heard a loud raucous roar coming from the Brownstone Inn in Paterson, NJ, this afternoon, it wasn’t a rowdy riot … it was a loving celebration that may have raised some decibel levels a little bit past normal. But, that’s what happened when good Italians get together to celebrate.

IMAG0803_1_1And celebrate we did. Over 100 plus strong family — spanning five generations — and friends gathered to celebrate the 100th birthday of the DeGrezia family matriarch … Angelina {I never knew that was her real name}. Most of us in the room knew her as Bebe or Aunt Bebe or Mom or Grandma. She was always Aunt Bebe to me. She was my grandmother’s sister-in-law.

At 100 — official as of Friday (Aug. 1) — Bebe remains active and fit as a fiddle. The years may have taken their toll, but you wouldn’t know it from her infectious smile … one that lit up the room continually through the afternoon.

To open the celebration, she was asked by the emcee what she attributed her longevity to. Without hesitation, she took — stole might be a better description — the microphone from him, waved her hand and boomed, “Family … and Love! Love! Love!”

She was right in the mix throughout the celebration, dancing with friends, relatives and grandkids … leading the Chicken Dance and Love Train … and soaking in every ounce of love showed her. Her eyes twinkled as she blew out a long, white candle on her birthday cake. When you get to be 100, you’re cut some slack with the candles.

The whole afternoon was an old-fashioned Italian celebration of exactly what Aunt Bebe said — family and love, love, love. Of course, a sumptuous meal was tossed in because, in addition to family and love, we Italians like to eat!

It’s amazing what this woman has seen. She lived through a world war, the depression, prohibition, another world war and throughout the technological advancements of the 50s, 60s, 70, 80s, 90s and the new millennium! And she witnessed each of the New York Yankees’ 27 world championships!

So here’s to you Bebe! We’ll see you next year!

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Family: We may not have it all together, but together we have it all.

Posted in Birthdays, celebration, encouragement, family, joy, love, relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Five Minute Friday — Begin

Posted on August 1, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

Well, it’s Friday. Time to join the hundreds over at Lisa Jo’s place for a Friday free for all writing frenzy for the final time.

You remember, each Friday we congregate at Lisa Jo’s place (http://lisajobaker.com/) to throw in our two cents worth on a specific prompt word for the day. The only rules — keep it to five minutes and write because we love words and the relief it is to just write them without worrying if they’re just right or not for joy in the process no matter how messy the result. And make sure you visit your neighbor to lend some encouragement.

Next week, however, the rules will be the same, but we’ll be meeting up at Kate Motaung’s hangout (http://katemotaung.com/)

This week’s word is BEGIN. The timer is set and off we go…

Where do I begin.

At the beginning, of course. No matter what the task, the first step is the beginning. Each day is a new beginning. Each moment gives us the chance to wipe the slate clean and start over.

It doesn’t matter what you did yesterday or last week or last month or last year. That’s history. It’s where you were. It doesn’t matter what you intend to do later or tomorrow or five years from now. Without taking that first step now — beginning — you are not going to get there.

That’s the beauty of life. We get the chance to remold our story as we move forward. But it all starts with that first step. It all starts with that beginning. STOP.

So, here’s to new beginnings … for Lisa Jo … for Kate … and for each and every one of us.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Crank the tunes when you have to clean the house. {a mantra from my wife}

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Driverless Cars

Posted on July 30, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

I haven’t really felt like writing much lately. In fact, I haven’t really felt like doing much of anything lately.

But this morning as I was surfing the Net, I came across a feed saying the Brits are planning to test driverless cars on roads in as many as three cities in a trial program to begin in January. It triggered a report I had heard while venturing to Maine a couple of months ago {that’s a key point I’ll be referring to later}. At the time, I stuffed it in the vast file cabinet in my mind. But it’s time to take it out for comment.

My first reaction was a driverless car — a vehicle equipped with hardware and software to allow completely robotic operation — would be cool, especially on a long trip. Heck, you could stretch out and take a nap while Priscilla did the work {hey, you have to name it something}. Or snuggle in with a good book {okay, who are we kidding … I would stick with the nap}. Or enjoy the burger, fries and drink without navigating through traffic.

Current technology uses a 64-beam laser that allows the vehicle to generate a detailed 3D map of its environment. The car then takes these generated maps and combines them with high-resolution maps of the world, producing different types of data models that allow it to drive itself. The system works with a very high definition inch-precision map of the area the vehicle is expected to use on-board computer systems coupled with remote computer farms.

But as I was driving through the rain in Maine that mid-June night, it struck me. Those computer systems have to be a lot better than current technology. My phone carrier — the computer of choice at this time and place — often runs at a blazing 0G speed, especially in rural areas. More often than not, I get 3G coverage only when piggybacking on other networks and even in major cities, 4G is available only when outside … in an open field … with the sun shining … standing next to a tower. Inside a building? Forgetaboutit!

I was also struck by the number of times I had to reset Doris {that soft, sultry voice who guides me on Mapquest, named after a blonde I knew who knew it all} as I zipped between population centers on the Maine Turnpike. Poor Doris would get hopelessly lost as she lost contact with the GPS satellite. Or maybe she just got spooked seeing the moose in the woods.

And I was struck by the fact I had to abandon Pandora because my computer’s {phone} battery couldn’t keep up with both Mapquest and Pandora and other running aps despite being plugged into a power supply.

And I thought about the times other drivers did something unexpected {did you ever drive on the Beltway around Washington, DC?}. I’m not sure I would risk my life on split-second decisions tied to on-board or off-board technology and/or enjoy my burger, fries and drink while bucking in traffic as fellow travelers made sudden unexplained stops or decided to switch lanes on a whim.

And I thought about my love affair with cars and the open road. We have a relationship that has spanned 50 years and probably well over 1,000,000 miles. You never have to ask me twice to take a road trip. I remember my Dad asking me how I could put 250 miles on my brand new Corvair … in one day! I’m not sure I’m ready for Priscilla. Latest prototypes call for no steering wheel, gas pedal or brakes. It’s 100% autonomous.

Technology has certainly made its mark on the automotive industry … or as Miranda Lambert puts it, Back before everything became automatic. Now we have remote starting, auto braking, cruise control, back up cameras and sensors, accident avoidance systems, blind spot and lane departure warnings, park assist and even tire pressure monitors.

These aren’t bad, but they have resulted in dumbed down drivers. I mean, park assist? I had to parallel park … in a standard shift, 900-foot long, two ton tank with no power steering … in traffic!

Just a couple of weeks ago, while returning my grandkids to Massachusetts, I hit a bump — okay it was really a mountain peak disguised as a bump — that caused the rear view mirror to come crashing down. My grandson thought it was the end of the world. How, oh how were we going to get him home? Well, I explained as his hands whitened on his tightened seat belt, I still had the side mirrors … and I knew how to use them.

In my day, we didn’t rely on idiot lights or on-board computers or tire pressure monitors. We actually checked our own oil — by hand — or had the oil and tire pressure checked when we got 25 cent a gallon gas by the attendant. I actually nursed my 56 Chevy back home from the Jersey shore in the wee hours of a summer morning — about 50 miles — with a blown oil gasket. And I knew how to get my truck back home when the transmission died {I wasn’t that far from home, but drove in reverse all the way}. I remember nonchalantly drying off the distributor cap on my 57 Caddy after she stalled going through a mid-wheel high puddle and even used my tie — yes, my tie — as an emergency fan belt. Back in the day, we knew our cars. They were more than just a means of transportation. They were our friends.

So, Priscilla, nothing personal, but I don’t think I’m quite ready for you. In fact, I actually do long for my father’s Oldsmobile.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: When you feel like crying, for joy or out of pain, let ‘er rip. If you don’t get those tears out, they will calcify in your chest and make it harder to love as fully and deeply as you would like to.

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Five Minute Friday — Finish

Posted on July 25, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

It’s Friday and you know what that means. Time for Lisa Jo’s prompt ( http://lisajobaker.com/2014/07/five-minute-friday-finish/)and five minutes of uninterrupted writing — transferring thoughts from my mind through my fingers to the screen for all to view. This week, I’m just jumping in.

The prompt is FINISH. The timer is set. It’s time to START…

It is finished.

With bittersweet emotions, our writing horde was advised Lisa Jo is finished as moderator for this fabulous five minute writing adventure {effective next week}. She’s not giving up writing — heaven forbid — but after nearly four years, this chapter must be finished. It must come to a close.

And thus it goes. Life is a series of chapters. There are passions we have that ebb and flow. And while the core remains, sometimes, it’s necessary to turn the page and just say, it is finished.

It’s not just these weekly assignments. They are ably be turned over to Kate Motaung (http://katemotaung.com/).  But it will be different. I suspect we’ll still gather and share and write. There will just be a different moderator perhaps taking us ever so slightly in a different direction.

I’m reminded of the words referenced above. It is finished. That’s what our Lord said as He expired on the cross. But we know it wasn’t the end of the story. It was the beginning of a new story … a story of hope and energy and peace {internal} and new life and salvation.

Our five minute forays gave us a chance to share our beliefs, our hopes, our thoughts, our dreams, our memories, our experiences … neatly — and sometimes … STOP

… not so neatly — packed in a five minute writing package.

I am grateful to Lisa Jo for allowing a senior male to join this remarkable “writing flash mob”. I think I sometimes contributed a different perspective to the prompt {or at least I hope I have} but I know I always received encouragement and enlightenment from my feminine writing friends. They made Five Minute Friday a welcome stopping place each week.

No, Lisa Jo. It is not finished. It is just beginning.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: A guy who hugs a lot is comfortable in his own skin.

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Post Vacation Funk

Posted on July 19, 2014 by wisdomfromafather

I have to admit, in the week since I’ve been back from my mini-vacation with my grandkids I have been in kind of a funk. Actually, if I’m being totally honest, I was in the same funk before the mini-vacation. It was only during the four days with the younguns that I felt somewhat “normal”.

But since coming back, I’ve realllly noticed the funk.

It started last Sunday when I said a watery goodbye to my daughters. I could see it in my older daughter’s misty eyes. I don’t know what she was thinking but I know what was flying through my mind. This could be the last time we’re together under happy circumstances. For the first time in forever, I felt old. The realization of my entrance into the winter of my life hit home.

And it has bothered me all week. No, it has been amplified all week.

I returned to chaos. Actually, I returned to normal, but it felt chaotic … kids coming and going … people coming and going … so many cars in the driveway they overspilled onto the lawn … annoying little inconveniences with my cars  … catch-up at work … over-commitments … hectic non-stop schedule.

And God has a twisted sense of humor. He teases me with potential changes. He feeds my melancholy with unsuspecting songs and names and events from the past that had special meaning for me. He fuels my emotions with memories … good memories, but again a realization of how things were, not how things are.

My trip to the Jersey shore is a perfect example. I love Seaside Heights. I grew up near there and it was my summer “home” during my late teenage years. But, since Sandy, it is not the same. It doesn’t have the same feel. It doesn’t have the same crowds. It doesn’t have the same energy.

I never went there for the rides or amusements. Okay, I went there primarily for the food and to flirt with the girls on the boardwalk. As I matured I went there for the surf and sand. Okay, I still go there for the food — makes me hungry for another sausage and pepper sandwich — and to people watch. My flirting days are well behind me.

In that sense, Seaside Heights — and all the Jersey shore — hasn’t changed. The relentless ebb and flow of the waves on the sandy beach relaxes my spirit and rejuvenates me. It gives me a sense of who is in charge … and it ain’t me!

I returned home, however, to read a report the owners of the iconic Carousel could be heading for auction. It is one of only two surviving American made classic carousels in the State of New Jersey and is intimately tied to the origins of Seaside Heights’ boardwalk. The Dr. Floyd L. Moreland Historic Dentzel/Looff Carousel at Casino Pier is now over 100 years old! A museum piece in itself, it whirls on the Seaside Heights boardwalk with music provided by the only continuously operating Wurlitzer Military Band Organ in the state. It and has 58 total animals, 35 moving horses, 18 stationary horses, two camels, a lion and a tiger and two chariots. It boasts 2,016 light bulbs and 15 original antique paintings from 1910 in the center casing. The machine was originally part of a trolley park called Island Beach Park in Burlington, NJ. In 1928 the park burned and the fire damaged the carousel, but was it was rescued, rebuilt and moved to Seaside Heights in 1932 and has been a mainstay on the boardwalk ever since. My grandkids and I were just on it last week. Wouldn’t it be a shame if we were among the last riders. {there’s a petition to save the Carousel at https://www.change.org/petitions/vincent-storino-of-casino-pier-save-the-antique-carousel}

That’s the type of news I’ve been processing since my return home. It’s not life-threatening. It’s not catastrophic. It’s not the end of the world … but it is the end of my world, the one tucked in the recesses of my mind. And that has helped feed my funk.

I even received a glowing report from my cardiologist. While she was pleased with my mechanics, I couldn’t help feeling she missed the emotional misfires in my life.

My rock is a pile of ash out in the gazebo. My mooring is convalescing from a serious auto accident. And, despite family and friends, I feel somewhat alone … and happy to be so.

It’s a good thing my Anchor is solidly rooted, or I really would be lost.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Find the people who make you laugh and follow them around like a golden retriever. Laughing is like a vitamin. You can never get enough of it.

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