In the Blink of an Eye — The Final Five Months 2

Posted on March 2, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer …
Romans 12:12

I  know Mom appreciated everyone coming for Mother’s Day. “It really did me good,” she wrote, “kept my mind off things. Unfortunately when they left reality returned.”

cartoon 1I reported to my friends and prayer partners, “Karen completed her first round of chemotherapy and seems to have weathered the experience [first round] well … not too many nor severe side effects. Now, we wait and see if the chemicals do their job. It’s been a roller coaster ride for both of us. We’re trying to be strong for each other but after almost 40 years together, we both know each other’s vulnerabilities all too well. She’s trying to be a ‘trooper’ through the pain and discomfort and I feel so helpless. We were encouraged after Monday’s treatment, even thought we knew it was the steroids. Her breathing wasn’t as labored, she could get around okay without too much difficulty and she slept well. After Tuesday’s treatment — the double dose — her breathing again became labored, it became a struggle to just move around the house and she didn’t really sleep. After yesterday’s treatment, she perked up a bit. We’ll see how she does today. We’ve been putting our ducks in order. God, that’s hard … facing reality while trying to remain optimistic. We also knew this was palliative treatment — I’ll take whatever extra time the Lord gives me — but it hits you right between the eyes when you see the words ‘dying’ and ‘not expected to live’ in black and white. Those were on the handicap parking permit form we received from the doctor. It just sucks the optimism right out and leaves a void.”

Putting our ducks in order should be translated into Mom putting our ducks in order. She was the strong one, facing this head on. She filled out the usual DNR and power of attorney and started dividing her things between the kids and grandkids.

We talked about final arrangements, what she wanted done, but in my typical procrastinistic way, I put off going to Sanderson-Moore to “finalize” arrangements. So Mom decided she was going to go with me to the post office one day and while we were there, she conveniently steered me into the funeral home (which is next door) where she was an active participant in choosing her arrangements. The biggest part was choosing the urn and she brought the book home so we could look at it, discuss the options and run it by you kids.

I know it was a necessary step, but it wasn’t one I was willing to make. I’m glad she saw through my facade and went with me. I needed her strength to get through that. And I think it was comforting for her to know all the “i’s” were dotted and “t’s” crossed. It was comforting to me to know her wishes would be honored.

We fought this together. On the recommendation of her chiropractor, Dr. Chris Ryan, we saw a homeopathic doctor, Dr. Les Moore, who helped ease her pain by performing acupuncture for the lungs and liver and prescribing herbs for alertness, fatigue, digestion and anti-cancer.

Before starting the second round May 27, Mom had blood work and x-ray. The tumor in the lung had shrunk some (not much, but enough to help with her breathing) but amazingly, her blood LDH went from over 1,000 down to 200. Dr. Ignaczak said it appeared the first round of chemo hit the cancer in the liver and it was starting to regenerate. But he was cautious about long-term prognosis.

baldThe report prompted me to update our friends and family, “It gave us both a chance to be cautiously optimistic for the first time since this ordeal first started and we were thankful for the many intercessions generated by our many prayer warriors. We have such a wonderful God!”

Mom’s hair started falling out and she wrote May 27, “Scott sent an e-mail. He shaved his head. Monica did mine yesterday. I cried the whole time but was worse when she did Joe! I made him keep his beard. He really looks cute. I’m okay today with it … Lots and lots of prayer. All I can say is God is definitely in control and awesome.”

To be continued …

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Make peace with your past – so it does not spoil your present. Your past does not define your future, your actions and beliefs do.

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Five Minute Friday — Morning

Posted on February 27, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

Happy Five Minute Saturday. Okay, it’s Five Minute Friday. I’m just trying to be realistic.

You know the drill. Over 100 of us gather at Kate’s place (http://katemotaung.com/2016/02/25/five-minute-friday-morning/) to mull over a prompt word and let out fingers weave a message from our mind, heart and/or soul for all to share. And sharing is the most fun. Visiting with other writers, discussing styles, learning new writing {and storytelling} techniques and sharing our innermost {albeit quick and unscripted} thoughts is a valuable byproduct of this weekly exercise. Most of us know when we miss a weekly assignment, we feel like our week is somehow out of kilter.

So, please go to Kate’s place and get to know some of these incredible writers. It’s worth a visit.

Back to today’s {okay, yesterday’s} assignment. The prompt word is MORNING. My thoughts are generalities and not necessarily carved in stone {although I try to adhere to the same routine whenever feasible}. The timer is set for five minutes, so let’s GO …

I guess I would qualify as a morning person. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy sleep — especially at night — but when the dawn breaks I’m ready to face a NEW day with NEW challenges and NEW excitement, perhaps with NEW joy and unfortunately, sometimes with some NEW disappointments. The key word, however, is NEW.

IMG_20160227_072208128_HDRI have a general routine. I brew my coffee, spend some time reflecting {my God time — currently working through the prophets, Amos to be specific}; send an a.m. photo my children to let them know I’m alive {for some reason they don’t think I can function independently on my own}, send messages of encouragement and perhaps a cartoon to my family and friends and  start the day.

Let’s see, that’s God, family and friends. Check.

That sets the tone for my day. With that bedrock, anything that comes my way can be easily handled … or at least accepted. With the clarity from above and support from below I can address the needs of the day.

I think that’s one reason why Jesus chose the … STOP

… morning to escape death. Despite rumors to the contrary, I was not around that first Easter morning, but I suspect the women and motley crew of apostles arrived at the burial site expecting one thing, only to find something totally different … an empty tomb. I don’t know if the sun was shining or if it was cold, dark and damp, but that empty tomb was a symbol of a new day … a new chapter in their lives … another new promise of hope despite the despair of the past few days.

That’s morning for me. A new day. A new page in the chapters of my life. Another new promise of hope.

Because He lives, I can face today!

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK: Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass… It’s about learning to dance in the rain.

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In the Blink of an Eye — The Final Five Months 1

Posted on February 24, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, persevere in prayer …
Romans 12:12

We actually have to go back a little further than April 2008. Back in November, both Mom and I got sick … just colds. The problem was Mom never really got better. In January she still was having trouble breathing, but the blockage appeared to be her nasal passage. Her back started to bother her more and more. On Jan. 31, she wrote, “Not sure what’s going on but I’m not right … I just want to feel better. I haven’t been right since November.”

And there were plenty of distractions as well. Grandpa Siccardi fell in New Jersey, not once but twice within a week in February. We had to make arrangements to have him admitted to a nursing home, getting him settled at Seneca Nursing & Rehabilitation Center in Waterloo. When he wasn’t responding to therapy, a follow-up x-ray showed a fracture and he underwent surgery for a hip replacement. Mom and I planned to remodel the downstairs bathroom so we could bring him to our house to live. And Gavin was born – all from mid-February to the end of March. Most of February was spent with me in New Jersey. A chunk of time was spent with Mom in Ohio .

But those were just distractions. Our lives changed forever in April.

Mom’s entry for April 14:
 Last four days have been trying. I finally went to the doctor. The shortness of breath hasn’t gone away. After an x-ray, they gave me an antibiotic and said I should call Monday to let them know how I was. Later that day they called and said I should come into the office on Monday. They said I had a suspicious lung and wanted a CT scan. [The] results came in. I have to see a lung specialist next Monday.
    I’m trying to stay positive but it is difficult … I am calm, so I know many prayers are being sent up.

Boys and Gma May 08The lung specialist confirmed the growth was lung cancer and we went the next day for a bronchoscopy. Our worst fears were realized. Not only was it cancerous, but small cell cancer as well.

We had a cry fest together that entire weekend. We were both numb, but Mom was in worse shape … pain and nausea on top of the stress. She intuitively knew how helpless I felt, which made her feel worse.

We saw Dr. Stephen Ignaczak May 1. Dr. Gloom told us up front there was no cure and the only treatment was palliative. The cancer had spread from the lung to her liver and possibly her bones and brain. He set up a chemo regimen – three days in a row spaced three weeks apart. Her first round was scheduled May 6-7-8.

To be honest, I think we were all surprised – the doctor, Mom and me – she even made it to the first treatment. She was so weak and in so much pain. Yet, she wrote, “God never gives more than we can handle. I sure hope He didn’t get this one wrong! … I have prayers going up for me in Illinois, Ohio, Massachusetts, Florida, New York and New Jersey. There are so many people praying for us. I have to be thankful for every day the Lord will bless me with.”

funny frontMom tried to remain upbeat and wrote, “I am trying to make the most of the time I do have and to do it without complaining or regret – just love, peace and joy. Oh yes, the cleaning of the house … Joe is going to have to be stuck with it after I’m gone! I have enough dust bunnies collected that I thought I would leave instructions on knitting his own cute furry animals with the dog hair that has collected in the hall ways and around some of the furniture I’m sure he could muster up another puppy!”

I tried to be helpful and supportive. After all these years of Mom taking care of everyone else, she needed someone to care for her. I gladly did it, although I wish funny insideshe didn’t need the care. I sat with her through her chemo sessions and helped her finish her Mother’s Legacy book. Ironically, she writes in her journal about being smoke free for seven months!

Mom handled the first round of chemo quite well, although she had a coughing spell a couple of days later. The doctors were fabulous, returning our after hours calls within minutes and prescribing medicine to get the cough under control.

To be continued …

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Every time you accept the negative into your head … you make it true.

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Five Minute Friday — Forget

Posted on February 20, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

Saturday. Must be time for Five Minute Friday. That’s where about 100 of us get together at Kate’s place (http://katemotaung.com/2016/02/18/five-minute-friday-forget/) to share our muse for the week on a specific prompt word. Sometimes the words flow easily … other times it’s a bit more challenging. But it is always an exercise to keep our minds sharp and focused … some precursory insight for my younger collaborators.

This week’s prompt is FORGET. The timer is set, so it is time to GO …

The prompt this week is somewhat appropriate following a funeral trip to New Jersey. I don’t ever want to forget my childhood … my family … my friends … my roots.

Yet, as the days dwindle by, I have forgotten a lot. The sights and sounds of my old neighborhood and stomping grounds are gone. The visuals have changed and perhaps the chatter of Italian women has been replaced by Spanish to Arabic.

But a lot is the same as well. The landscape may have different tenants, but it has the same energy — for good or bad — as in the years I grew up.

I was there for the funeral of my great-aunt … but it wasn’t a time for sadness. It was a time to celebrate a 101 year life and reflect on the influences she had on her family and friends. Although she did suffer from some dementia, there were times when she knew exactly what was going on. My most vivid remembrance is of her dancing at her 100th birthday party a year and a half ago and visiting with her during the last family reunion. Even in November — at another funeral — when she saw me outside church she squeezed … STOP

… my cheeks like she did so many times when I was growing up.

Following the wake, I had dinner with my uncle and cousin and his wife {thanks Michelle for a great meal}, again catching up on families and events and reaching into that well of memories. At the repast I spent time with my cousins recounting the memories — and innocence — of time gone by.

I also stopped at my maternal aunt’s house only to be disturbed at how much she has “forgotten” in the six months or so since I saw her last. To be honest, it scared me. The visit reminded me I was rapidly approaching that age bracket where memory starts fading. Aunt Betty and my cousins have certainly gone to the head of my prayer list.

I don’t necessarily want to go back in the past. I have many great growing up memories. I wouldn’t trade any of them. But each was a building stone of my life — the happy times … the not so happy times … the triumphs … the trials … the people in my life along the way …  the laughter … the tears. Each event was another stitch in the fabric of my life.

I don’t ever want to forget that.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Life may surprise us, but life never surprises God!

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In the Blink of an Eye — New York, New York 4

Posted on February 17, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear … 1 John 4:18a

When we moved to the house in Willard, we set Grandma Simpson up in the bigger motel room, but after Jonathan and Nicolle moved out, Mom came up with the idea of reopening the motel … not just as a motel, but as a quasi bed-and-breakfast. I turned the project over to her and let her imagination run wild.

ant & momThe first step was to have the long cabin renovated and move Grandma Simpson into it. Then it was getting the motel up and running.

Mom enjoyed getting the rooms ready, making them comfortable and cozy despite the limitations of the ’50s style. And she came up with the hook … a complimentary breakfast.

She was great at it. She rarely served the same meal twice and experimented with eggs, pancakes, syrups and toppings and breads and muffins. We stayed in some bed-and-breakfasts over the years and I can tell you, Mom’s kitchen was tops. I can say that because I got to sample the meals as well!

joe & momWe had people from all over the world and met some great people over the years. We had guests from 31 states – from New York locals to Alaska, Maine to California, Florida to Minnesota – and 17 countries, including Australia, France, Germany, India, Israel, Italy, Japan, the Philippines, Switzerland and Turkey.

On the down side, it was time consuming, especially on weekends in the summer. Coupled with the newspaper schedule, we were “stuck” here with little time for ourselves. Weekend getaways were difficult. In fact, going grocery shopping was a highlight of the week. We usually went together and I always insisted we stop somewhere for lunch, especially if we went to Ithaca.

Mom liked visiting the different wineries around the lakes and she appreciated a good wine with or after dinner.

me & mom at nicolle's weddingWe closed the motel in 2005 after a horrible summer trying to deal with Grandma Simpson and guests. Between running to the hospital or nursing home and running the motel, Mom needed a break so we shut down for the winter … and discovered more time for ourselves. We knew we had Deanna’s graduation and Joe’s wedding the following summer so we just decided to not reopen.

It was the best decision we had ever made. While we still had to work around the paper, we suddenly had more time for ourselves and were able to take day trips or even long weekends together. Throughout our New York years, we virtually did everything together … from eating together, shopping together, working together, loving being together.

Mom was becoming more resentful of the paper … no, more resentful of how it was being received. She would often say, “This area doesn’t deserve you.”

Her heart was in the right place. She was constantly worried about my health and recognized — before I did — all-nighters took longer and longer to recover from.

I remember dancing with Mom at Nicolle’s wedding (yes, we occasionally danced — Mom loved to dance but my two left feet always got in the way). You guys gave us a new song, Remember When, not as a replacement for True Love, but as a complement to it. My allergies kicked in and Mom’s eyes welled up as I told her our job was done as parents. We’re back at the beginning … just the two of us. Now we could grow old together and enjoy the fruits of our labor … our grandkids.

serious frontThat song rang so true … especially the last part … We both would have done it all over again and we were both glad for the life we had.

So, this probably is as good a place as any to move on to the next — and probably the hardest — chapter … The Final Five Months.

To be continued …

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: God created the world round so we don’t look too far down the road.

serious inside

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Five Minute Friday — Limit

Posted on February 14, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

Five Minute Friday. It’s an exercise where over 100 of us gather at Kate’s place (http://katemotaung.com/2016/02/11/five-minute-friday-limit/) to share our meager thoughts on a common prompt word.

I’ve been involved with Five Minute Friday for a few years and I have to tell you, it’s become more than an exercise. Although I rarely make the Friday post, I feel a responsibility to contribute. It’s almost like a school assignment. And no one wants a zero or incomplete.

In the past when circumstance prevented me from completing a prompt response, I felt it necessary to backtrack a few days — or even weeks — when I was again able to take five {or 10 or 15 or whatever} minutes and write from the mind and heart.

This is one of those weeks. Fighting a head cold with extra work demands, doctor appointments and … well … life, Friday skipped by {not unusual} and Saturday skipped by. Because of the frigid wind-whipped weather, church services were cancelled so I find myself with an “extra” hour or so. I suppose I could have invested into more “reflective” thoughts, but how much closer can you get to God than allowing His (God-given) thoughts to resonate through the (God-given) fingers to the page.

So. Let’s tackle this week’s prompt … LIMIT. The timer is set so let’s GO …

I always told my children the world had no limits. The only limit they had was dictated by them … if they believed they could.

IMG_20160214_110438322I still believe that, but as I age I realize there are physical limits we all possess. If, for example, I tried to run a 5K race, they would be scraping me off the pavement at the .1K mark. If I didn’t collapse, my foot certainly would have dropped me to the pavement.

But it doesn’t mean my mind is limited by my limitations. I can dream. I can visualize. I can imagine. I can remember. I can look forward.

IMG_20160214_110403469This flooded to mind this morning when I happened to catch a commercial for a flea market find show … you know where people find junk and turn it into treasure. My wife was like that. I can’t tell you the number of times she had me pull over to a garbage heap to retrieve something she saw in her mind’s eye. Our house is replete with knicks and knacks someone else thought was trash but she insisted was treasure.

STOP …

… I suspect we’re a lot like that, except we think we’re trash and God sees the treasure. We like to kick ourselves to the curb … too fat … not pretty enough … too flighty … too sarcastic … the list goes on and on. Yet, God reaches into the pile and plucks us out. He gives us the energy … the self-worth … the vision. He gives us a reason to believe, not only in Him but, more important, in ourselves by adding a little “less” — you read that right — to our lives.

And that transforms limit to limitless!

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Don’t mistake hard work for perfection.

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In the Blink of an Eye — New York, New York 3

Posted on February 10, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear … 1 John 4:18a

Grandma Simpson eventually moved in with us on Peterman Road, a move I initiated and Mom didn’t always embrace. Grandma could be — well, let’s say — caustic and hurtful at times and your mother took these comments personally and to heart.

funny frontGrandma Siccardi took a turn for the worse and died just as we were getting ready to close on the house/motel in Willard in August 1998. Watching my Mom die was difficult, but your mother saw it differently. She had some alone time with my Mom and they were able to settle any differences they had. Mom never told me what they talked about, but they both seemed more at peace.

Going through her journal, here is what she wrote Sept. 9, 1998:

funny inside 1It’s been almost three weeks since my mother-in-law funny inside 2died. These past five weeks are a blur. Mom died, we moved, Uncle George died two weeks to the day after Mom. We bought a house with motel units, the paper isn’t making money … now we have a mortgage to meet and taxes. Joe’s wedding is coming up … rapidly. I have no clue how we’ll meet all these responsibilities but I also know God does.

february 2february alternateWatching Mom die was difficult but her concern for others — even at the end — amazed me. She was dying but she was worried about everyone else.

At night I would sit outside and watch the miracle of life in the birds, trees and flowers. Somehow it seemed to balance out everything of the day. After watching Mom slip away during the day, some hope and peace would be found in the miracle of a bird catching his dinner … watching the squirrels frolic on the lawn … seeing the colors of fall appear each day. Somehow I knew God was still in control.

To be continued …

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: The optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious to the rose. —  Kahlil Gibran

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Five Minute Friday — Focus

Posted on February 6, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

Okay, between fighting a head cold and facing the trip from Maine to New York, I haven’t been in the mood to sit down and write … even for Five Minute Friday on Saturday. But, as they say, the show must go on, so here’s my latest installment for my friends both here and at Kate’s place (http://katemotaung.com/2016/02/04/five-minute-friday-focus/) . you can learn more about Five Minute Friday at Kate’s place as well.

The prompt is FOCUS … which is kind of funny since my focus today is tempered with antihistamines. But, the timer is set so who knows what will come out. GO …

I don’t always have a hard time keeping things in focus. For example, I can put all my uninterrupted attention on … uh … well, I’ll get back to that.

Seriously, I am not a very focused person. I’m not a scatterbrain, but it seems whenever I tackle a job, my mind sort of wanders in all different directions. Oh, a butterfly. Look, the sun just peeked from behind the clouds.

Get the picture?

Even my faith walk is sometimes less than structured. I do have a prayer routine — quiet time — but I’m sure the Lord sometimes shakes His head as I meander through. Why did … ? How come …? I wonder if …

I somewhat envy those people who can tackle a task and stick to it. They’re remarkable. My wife was like that — when she got into the zone, there was no stopping her. I never find that “zone” … at least not directly. I kind of zig zag from point A to point B with a lot of diversions — and sometimes unexpected surprises… STOP

…are discovered.

To be honest, I’m glad God wired me that way. Life would be boring if we just plotted from point A to point B without taking in the sights and sounds and thoughts and surprises along the way. Oh look, the mailman just pulled into the driveway.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: When you want the world to change, lead by example, and others are sure to follow.

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In the Blink of an Eye — New York, New York 2

Posted on February 3, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear …
1 John 4:18a

The paper gave her a chance to grow as well. She tried selling … didn’t work. Her sales skills were about as accomplished as mine. She started taking pictures (I hate taking pictures) … worked very well. She had that eye. She was willing to wait for the right shot. She was inventive and intuitive. She saw the unique in the ordinary.

She loved taking nature photos and was real proud of her pictures of the white deer and the sunsets over Seneca Lake. And she was good with people shots … especially her grandkids. She took tons of pictures when Hillary Clinton and other national personalities were in town and was commissioned to photographically chronicle one of the Induction Weekends for the Women’s National Hall of Fame.

cartoonShe noted in a column she wrote April 15, 1997 – but never gave to me to print (I “discovered” a bunch of them among her journals and papers) – an anecdote of her youth:

Some of you have probably seen me around the county. I’m the one generally with a camera around my neck wearing a Cleveland Browns jacket. I generally just fly in and fly out again.

I’ve become quite good at this “fly” stuff. I have Mom to thank for that. She trained me how to be a “fly” when I was a teen.

cole & momAs teenagers we all know how to get under our parents’ “skin,” or “pushing their buttons.” I was no exception, though I don’t often admit it. There was one particular day, however…

Mom was raising my sister and me on her own (I was a ’90s kid in the ’60s) and worked two jobs. Being the oldest, it was my job to prepare dinner and clean up and do my studies, etc., etc. All my sister had to do was sit around and look cute!

I decided enough was enough. Why did I have to do everything while she got off scot free?

It was time to stand up for my rights. I prepared a speech which I would deliver to my mother right after dinner. Surely she would see the gross injustice and insist my sister begin to pull her own weight around the house.

As with the millions of teens before me and certainly after me, I couldn’t have been more wrong.

looking prettyI remember getting as far as “You’re just not being fair!” when it happened. My mother seemed to lose it. I hit the “big” button. You know the one – you push, parent goes bezerk immediately!

A wooden paddle used to be the choice of discipline in those days when parents used to be in charge of their children, not the other way around. The paddle was out of reach so Mom grabbed the next best thing – a fly swatter!
  

I decided the best thing I could do was run … around the table that is. I honestly didn’t think my Mom would chase me. Wrong again!

As we circled the table for the third time I began to laugh. Unfortunately my mother failed to see the humor. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: “Mom, I’m not a fly.”

Mom: “Stop running around the table.”

Me: “Do you know how funny you look?”

Mom: “When I get my hands on you!”

Me: “Wow! You’re really out of shape!”

About that time she lunged across the table and whacked me a shot. It was then I began to laugh. I knew Mom wanted to laugh, too. She started to – yelling at the same time. That’s when it happened. She broke into laughter and her false teeth fell out and she yelled like she had a mouth full of marbles. By now I was laughing so hard tears were streaming down my face.

After we composed ourselves, I discovered speeches work – for politicians.

To be continued …

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK: Do not rely on others for your answers. Seek the wisdom within the kingdom of your heart.

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Five Minute Friday — Quiet

Posted on January 30, 2016 by wisdomfromafather

It’s Saturday so it must be time for Five Minute Friday. That’s where over 100 of us sit down for five minutes and transform a prompt word from the recesses of our mind into {hopefully} discernable thoughts. We write for five minutes — hence the name of the exercise — then congregate at Kate’s place (http://katemotaung.com/2016/01/28/five-minute-friday-quiet/) to share, read and encourage others.

This week’s prompt word is QUIET. The timer is set and here’s what is rattling around in my brain. So let’s GO …

Last week I was nestled in my chair. The television was softly playing oldies which may influence some of my words. I start writing …

This week, I am nestled in my chair. The television is softly playing oldies which may influence some of my words. I start writing …

What’s the difference?

The first setting was in New York. The second is in  Maine.

The circumstances are the same, yet when I’m in Maine, I’m in a “quiet” place {of my choosing}. I somehow successfully blot out the ambient clutter of New York life and savor the quiet time to clear my thoughts and refresh me.

That’s what quiet means. It’s a place of reflection. It’s re-connecting with the important things in life … relationships with, for me, God and myself. It’s clearing out the clutter of everyday life, taking a deep breath and remembering what matters.

Quiet can be anywhere. Another quiet place for me is the Jersey shore. Just watching the waves lap just so far on the sands reminds me I’m not in control. Here in Maine, it’s the song of the river, the fresh unspoiled snowscape, the sun, even if it’s partially hidden by clouds. It’s where I come to remember. Be … STOP

… still and know I am God.

THOUGHT TO REMEMBER:  Success is not final, failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts. — Winston Churchill

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