Today’s reflection is from Rev. Stavros Akrotirianakis of St. John the Baptist Greek Orthodox Church, Tampa, FL.
Remember the days of old, consider the years of many generations; ask your father, and he will show you; your elders and they will tell you. — Deuteronomy 32:7
As I reflect on my life, I can recall people and conversations that changed the course of my life or were instrumental in helping me become who I am today. One such person was Frank Panezich, or Mr. P as we called him. He was my high school English teacher my senior year. I wrote on him previously, but I’ll mention him again. He was a hard teacher. He made our class do a 10-15-minute timed write to begin class each day. Many of us, including me, dreaded it. We had to sit down and write quickly, because we would get a grade for each day. What I didn’t realize at the time was Mr. P was teaching me how to write quickly, how to quickly put ideas together and put them down on paper. Mr. P is as responsible as anyone for the Prayer Team, the daily writing I do, because he is the one who taught me the discipline of writing daily and writing quickly. I wish I could thank him. He passed away several years ago, so I’ll never get my chance.
Then there was Fr. James Adams, my priest when I was in college, who told me to “be a survivor and not a victim” in life. A conversation I had with him in August 1991 remains one of the most profound and life-changing conversations of my life. I remember back in 2007, Fr. James came to visit me in Tampa, and we served the Divine Liturgy together. At the end of the service, I gave a sermon, and it was about how Fr. James had changed my life. I remember saying, “we usually save these kinds of comments for a eulogy, and we don’t tell people in life what they really mean to us.” I’m so glad I thanked him in person that day. He has since passed away.
George Reed was my Scoutmaster. He taught me many things in Boy Scouts I still use today in my life. I recently called him, after not talking to him in over 20 years, just to say thank you. It not only made his day, it made my day too. It was a great opportunity to reminisce about old times, and also for him to know that his contribution in my life has not been forgotten. The thing that had been forgotten was I hadn’t gone back and thanked him.
Each of us has people like Mr. P, Fr. James and Mr. Reed in their lives. Each of us has people who have changed the course of our life for the better, even though we didn’t know it at the time.
Each of us has probably changed the course of someone else’s life, even though we may not know it. In fact, we may not even remember it. When I told Fr. James, for instance, our conversation in August 1991 changed the trajectory of my life, he didn’t remember the conversation. And that’s not a bad thing — it meant he had had that conversation to serve God and to serve me, not for any kind of reward. Lots of us will wonder as we go through life, “have I made an impact on others?” Parents will wonder that about their children, spouses will wonder that about their spouses, lawyer will wonder that for their clients, doctors for their patients, teachers for their students, etc.
One of the easiest and most rewarding things one can do is simply say thank you to someone. Whether that person is from your recent past or your distant past, everyone likes receiving a thank you. I think it is especially important to remember people from our distant past, people who are retired, who aren’t on the front lines anymore. It is important to let them know the things they did really mattered in our lives. We don’t say “thank you” enough to anyone, but especially to those in our distant past.
I’ll never be able to thank Mr. P in person. I wish I could. I’m glad I got to thank Fr. James when he was alive, and recently with Mr. Reed. There are others that come to my mind I now feel motivated to track down and thank. If we are honest, we can all think of people like this, from our distant as well as our recent past, who have had a profound impact on us, who we may not see often or at all.
Think of people you no longer see who have made an impact on you, and write or contact them just to say thank you. It will make their day, and it will make your day as well!
Thank someone from your distant past. Thank someone from your recent past. And thank someone who you see all time. Make thanking people part of your daily life!
Lord, thank You for all the helpful influences I have had in my life. Thank You for the people who have impacted me constantly, like my parents and siblings, and thank You for those who have impacted me in significant ways, even if they don’t know they have (list some of these people). Help me also to be a good influence on others, whether I know it or not. Amen.
Fr. Stavros was born in Whittier, CA, and graduated from Whittier College in 1994 with a degree in History. He wrote a book entitled Byzantium Comes to Southern California: The Story of the Los Angeles Greeks and the Building of St. Sophia Cathedral which was published by Light and Life in 1994. Fr. Stavros entered Holy Cross Seminary in the fall of 1994 and married his wife Lisa in 1995. In 1997, he was ordained as a deacon by the late-Metropolitan Anthony of St. Francisco at St. Sophia Cathedral in Los Angeles. He served for one year as the deacon to His Eminence Metropolitan Methodios of Boston. In May 1998, Fr. Stavros was ordained to the Holy Priesthood at the Chapel of the Holy Cross in Brookline, MA, and shortly thereafter graduated from the seminary. His first assignment was as the proistamenos of St. Nicholas Greek Orthodox Church, Enfield, CT. In 2000, Fr. Stavros was transferred to the Metropolis of Atlanta, to the Greek Orthodox Church of the Holy Trinity in Asheville, NC, where he served from 2000-04. While in Asheville, Fr. Stavros became the director of St. Stephen’s Summer Camp for the Metropolis of Atlanta. In September 2004, Fr. Stavros was again transferred to St. John the Baptist Greek Orthodox Church, Tampa, where he has been serving ever since. During his tenure, St. John the Baptist has grown from 220 families to 391 families at present. The church has many thriving programs, especially in the liturgical ministry, the GOYA and the Bible study. Each year, two to three adult retreats are also held at the parish. Fr. Stavros has served as the director of Stephen’s Metropolis of Atlanta summer camp since 2000. The Prayer Team Ministry, a daily reflection authored by Fr. Stavros which began in February 2015, has produced three books, Let All Creation Rejoice: Reflections on Advent, the Nativity and Epiphany , The Road Back to Christ: Reflections on Lent, Holy Week and the Resurrection. and Blessed is the Kingdom, Now and Forever: Reflections on the Divine Liturgy. He and his wife, Presbytera Lisa, reside in Tampa with their son, Nicholas.
THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you’d have preferred to talk. — Larson
This theme has long been on my radar, but I just, this morning, found myself searching for a quote I wished to send to another – and then started writing about it – so, alas, this topic thick in the air for me, thee, many, I do believe – – here’s the quote I searched for – that says it better than I:
“Without realizing it, we fill important places in each other’s lives. It’s that way with the guy at the corner grocery, the mechanic at the local garage, the family doctor, teachers, neighbors, coworkers. Good people who are always “there,” who can be relied upon in small, important ways. People who teach us, bless us, encourage us, support us, uplift us in the dailiness of life. We never tell them. I don’t know why, but we don’t.
And, of course, we fill that role ourselves. There are those who depend in us, watch us, learn from us, take from us. And we never know.
You may never have proof of your importance, but you are more important than you think. There are always those who couldn’t do without you. The rub is that you don’t always know who.”
– Robert Fulghum, author of All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten
For myself, I’ve often been ‘shocked/surprised’ when someone says, “I just do what you told me worked for you…” and then they truck something out I have no memory of ever saying, but realize, it sounds like me, or I get enough info from them to understand the time frame in which I said such and such and well – yup, sounds like me or my thoughts on the matter, at that time and place – Sometimes, I’m left for years wondering if what I said/did, that was greeted with terse acknowledgement or silence, was actually of any value or help – – and once in awhile, one gets feedback – but often, one plants seeds and never, during their lifetime, ever know for sure, which ones sprouted/took root and which ones didn’t – but yes, I try hard not to wait for funeral services to say that which should have been said long ago – 🙂
You shared another good quote and stated it well. I often wonder if anything I’ve said or shared mattered, often to find out later it was the right phrase for the right person at the right time. I always say I am just the conduit. Have a great week!
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“I’m always just the conduit” is how I think of it too – if it’s simply about me/my ego having my own way, I’ve learned, the best thing I can do is keep my mouth shut and let everyone think me an idiot, instead of opening it and confirming their suspicions’ – I do believe both Abraham Lincoln AND Mark Twain counseled such things in their own ways – 🙂