“We have to talk.”
Those are four words that bring sheer fear to every male on the planet — from the days of Adam, I suspect — to the present day. Even in a dream, those words bring chills to a sleepy spine.
Those were the words that literally haunted me after a dream about a month ago. I know they certainly contributed to my melancholic mood over the past few weeks.
It wasn’t a long dream. And, has generally been the case since Karen died, she was not visible. But her voice was very much there.
The scene unfolded in my parents’ home, which is odd because Karen and I never lived at my parents’ home. But I readily recognized the brocade styled carpet, the sectional and the louvered closet doors {although they were in the bedroom, not the living room … but, hey, it was a dream}.
All of a sudden, Karen’s voice clearly stated THE question. “We have to talk.”
With that I woke up, totally confused even after nearly six years of widowerhood. It wasn’t a comment that came up often during our 40 years of marriage {although it did come up … generating the same sense of trepidation}.
Why after all these years did Karen utter these words? What was on her {my?} mind?
I immediately thought of the thousands of times I might have let her down during our marriage. I thought of the hurts and slights I can never make up for. And it weighed on my psyche.
What was even more disturbing was the abruptness of the dream. It came out of nowhere and it just ended without resolution. I just knew Karen and I had “to talk.”
Then last week, I had a series of subsequent dreams … each picking up where the last one left off. They were equally vivid … with the bonus of my dear wife appearing and interacting in dreamlife.
I’ll relate those snippets tomorrow — on what would have been our 46th anniversary.
THOUGHT TO REMEMBER: Find a spirituality you can wear like a loose coat that keeps you warm no matter the weather. God should provide you comfort not make you feel ashamed of yourself.
The Light 
I never get an explanation of my dreams when they happen, but later a clue arrives sometimes. Perhaps, your anniversary is a clue. 🙂
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Stay tuned 🙂
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